Some people’s stories are harder to tell than others. Some people are dealt such an awful hand in life. People who know me well know that I find it difficult talking to new people, however, if someone makes a beeline for me which they often do I will always engage in conversation. I had seen Kate a few times during my first few weeks but I had never spoken to her. I really didn’t leave my room very often during this time. Kate was very visibly pregnant. One day we started talking and we got along really well. We began spending a lot of time together.
Kate had struggled for what sounded like the majority of her life. She was bullied in school and eventually left altogether. She spoke fondly of her mum but it seemed her dad was a very difficult person to be around. Kate began hanging around with the wrong people and started taking drugs. She fell pregnant at 16 years old, she had 4 children and was pregnant with her fifth. Kate like Joseph was an addict and as a consequence of this her children were removed from her care and placed with her parents. Kate very clearly loved her children but addiction had taken over her life.
During Covid Kate’s eldest daughter became ill very unexpectedly and she passed away. Kate didn’t find out about her daughters death until a week later, she was told over the phone by a social worker. She was also told that she wasn’t allowed to attend the funeral. Kate spiralled into the depths of despair and consequently tried to take her own life. When I met Kate she had already been in hospital for many months but she was clean from drugs and determined to be given a chance to be a mother to her unborn baby.
Kate was kind, caring and if she could help people she would. She was often my shoulder to cry on. She was always so thoughtful and never took advantage of anyones good nature. She had made sure that any money she had was spent on everything her new baby would need. She was so prepared for her arrival and I think we were all willing her to succeed. The council had found her somewhere to live and she was given a discharge date. She was so excited for the arrival of her daughter,
Kate’s behaviour soon began to change. One day she told me she was meeting a drug dealer to get cocaine. I am no angel but I didn’t want her to undo everything that she had fought so hard for. I really tried to get help for her but it was too late, she quickly fell back into the arms of addiction. In her last week in hospital Kate became someone I did my best to avoid, she was always chasing her next high and I couldn’t be around that. She was such a good friend to me but as much as I wanted to help her I couldn’t risk ruining my own recovery. When Kate was discharged from hospital I felt a wave of relief wash over me – I felt so guilty about that.
I later found out that when Kate was told about being discharged from hospital she was also told that her baby would be taken from her at birth. Despite completely turning her life around for her unborn baby nobody was willing to give her a chance. Her last bit of hope was completely shattered. She had absolutely nothing else to live for. She has given up.
I believe had Kate been given support she would have been an amazing mum this time around. When Kate was discharged from hospital I never heard from her again. Kate is just another example of individuals who were completely let down by the system. When Kate was told her baby would be taken away she had nothing left to fight for.
I tried to make contact with Kate a few times once she was discharged from hospital but I never received a response.
I hope that one day Kate gets the help she deserves and is reunited with her children.
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