The realisation that I was going to loose my job hit me like a ton of bricks. My mood plummeted and I felt like I had lost a part of my identity. Teaching is so much more than a job it’s a lifestyle choice. You don’t become a teacher for the money. You don’t become a teacher for the holidays. You become a teacher because you love what you do. It’s often thankless but there are moments in your career that make it so worth it.
I became a teacher because some of my teachers had such a big impact on my life when I was at school. Some of them are still in my life today. They helped a troubled and confused teenager navigate her way through school. I wanted to be that for somebody else. I wanted to really make a difference to the student’s lives who I taught. I understood what it was like to go through things as a child and feel very alone.
So, after I had Archie I worked so hard. I was a mum, I was working full time and I was also studying towards a degree. At times things were touch but I was determined to become a teacher so that I could really make a difference.
When I lost my job I started to question whether I was even any good at it. I felt so easily replaceable and undervalued whilst I was at my worst. I remember thinking maybe I just wasn’t any good at it and they needed a reason for me to leave. But I knew deep down that I was brilliant at my job, I gave it 100% everyday. I showed up for the students I taught, not just physically but so many of them knew that I would give them time and understanding with anything at all.
The other day I got an email from two of the students that I used to teach, they had seen this blog and my article in the New Shopper. I didn’t get the opportunity to say goodbye to the students at my latest school, I felt as though I had just abandoned them. When I received this email I knew they didn’t feel that way at all. It said:
“Hi Miss Ward, we want to say that everyone at ****** misses and hope you’re doing ok. We’re all here for you. We wanted to make it known that we’re thinking of you and care about you deeply”
When I received that message I knew that during my time at that school I had done all that I had set out to do. I had impacted the lives of my students because I really showed up for them and had time for them. I received that email at a time that I really needed it.
Teaching is hard, it’s thankless a lot of the time and nobody should be made to feel how I felt by their workplace. But this was one of those moments that makes it all worth it.
Leave a Reply