I have never been a believer in the phrase “everything happens for a reason” – in my opinion too many terrible things happen in the world for that to be true. Some may say the phrase offers them hope, which I can understand. However, for people who feel as though everything in their lives goes wrong or as though the world is against them, this phrase doesn’t mean very much at all.
I often hear people say if they could do life over again they wouldn’t change anything. They believe that their past has shaped their future. Again, I can understand the logic but I cannot agree with it. If I got a do-over, a chance to change the past and ultimately the direction I have found myself in I would absolutely go back. Of course I wouldn’t change everything but I would change a lot of the bad things. I don’t believe people should have to go through painful and traumatic times to build resilience or show strength.
The past does shape our futures. I am in agreement with that. But that doesn’t mean it has shaped our futures for the better. I am in a place where I think I can get better, however, I will always have an illness. An illness that may not have been caused by my past but one that has been heightened due to it.
I didn’t need to go through hard times to know I was strong. I didn’t need to make it out the other side to prove that I was a good person. I like most people often block those events out, usually in ways that are harmful to myself.
You don’t have to go through a storm to appreciate the sun. That is just not true. These things happen not for a reason, not to shape our future. Quite frankly they often happen because life can be shit. There is simply no other explanation.
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