Part One of My Story: Speaking Out on Systemic Failures
For a long time, I’ve gone back and forth about whether to speak my truth. I never wanted to point fingers or name organisations, even when I felt deeply let down. I held onto the hope that, in time, accountability would be taken without me needing to say anything.
But over the last few months, I’ve learned something hard: no matter how much pain you carry, the system finds a way to pass blame somewhere else. And when no one takes responsibility, nothing changes.
So I’m speaking up — not only for myself, but for every other person who has been failed. This is the first part of my truth. It won’t be the last.
My Inpatient Experience
In October 2024, I was admitted to a psychiatric ward at Queen Mary’s Hospital in Sidcup, managed by Oxleas NHS Foundation Trust.
I want to be clear from the start: this isn’t about the frontline staff. Most of them chose this career because they wanted to help people. They showed me kindness when they could. But kindness wasn’t enough — and through no fault of theirs, the system left me feeling safe but not better.
Unsafe Ratios, Unsafe Environments
The ward was mixed gender: 10 male patients, 10 female patients. On a typical day there were 5 staff members on shift — a ratio of roughly 1 staff member to 4 patients.
But the reality was worse. Some patients required 1:1 or even 2:1 supervision, meaning the staff-to-patient ratio for the rest of us was even lower. On a bad day, 3 staff members were left to care for 18 patients with complex needs.
And sometimes? Every staff member on shift was female. This left women on the ward, already vulnerable, in unsafe situations.
I remember thinking: If something happens, who is here to protect us?
The Strain on Staff
I often felt sorry for the staff. They were overworked, underpaid, and visibly disappointed in how little time they had to spend supporting patients beyond mandatory tasks. Many confided in me that they wanted to make a difference but felt stuck in a system that only allowed them to “manage,” not to truly help.
They were the ones who bore the backlash of frustrated patients, distressed families, and an overstretched system. They deserved better — and so did we.
Weekly Consultant Meetings
Every inpatient had a weekly appointment with a consultant to review their care plan. But these meetings were brief and superficial. Half an hour once a week with someone who barely knew you — how can that possibly give them a clear picture of your needs?
With such high staff turnover, only a handful of staff knew patients well enough to contribute meaningfully. Care plans felt like paperwork, not personalised support.
My Lasting Truth
I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again:
“Hospital kept me safe, but it didn’t make me better.”
And I will always stand by that.
Because being “safe” isn’t enough. People deserve care that helps them heal, not just care that prevents the worst from happening.
Why I’m Speaking Out
Of course, I can’t speak for every psychiatric ward in the country. But I can say this: Oxleas NHS Foundation Trust had no idea how to make inpatient care truly beneficial.
And this is just the beginning.
This is Part One of a series where I will be highlighting systemic failures in the way mental health care is delivered. My inpatient experience at Queen Mary’s was flawed — but as I would soon discover, things after discharge were about to get a whole lot worse.
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